I wasn’t going to respond even though I agreed to last night (addressed to mom and dad) because I feel like I’ve explained everything so many times, but I’m in class right now typing and have nothing better to do, so here goes. And rather than email, I may as well inform all cause I have nothing to hide. I’m going to attempt to explain further where I am. I think I expanded in my last blog as to HOW I sort of got here but hopefully this is even more informative. For those of you who have sat down and listened this may be redundant, just to warn you.
So I experienced that slow and steady breakdown of failures and questions during the latter part of my walk. I was depressed and constantly tired because of the way I was consumed with my problems. Once I finally concluded that my approach to life was leaving me short of satisfaction I decided to take a step of faith…away from God. Now, because of the way I isolated myself from my peers in high and college I was “protected” from a great deal of things. Splendid right? What if I said not at all? I think that that caused damage in a lot of ways because rather than dealing with those things then, when I still had close and grounded friends, I’m dealing with them now when I’m more my own then ever, and free to make my own conclusions with less input from others compared to when we were younger. It also wreaked havoc on the way I saw people outside of church. In order to protect myself from “those terrible people and those terrible things” (that I actually wanted) I made them out to be completely foolish and dangerous.
I will try to breakdown some of the changes that have taken place since that turning point. Firstly I am happy. It would be utterly naïve as Christians to think you can’t live life without Christ – billions of people do it. Many of those people are messed the heck up but don’t pretend that many of those people aren’t doing well too. Not to mention the turmoil within the Christian community. I feel like faith is so subjective on both who you are and WHERE you are. There are countless other religions who all have real convictions and real feelings toward their God’s. Otherwise they wouldn’t go to such extreme lengths. People all over the world look at Christians and sincerely say to themselves “it’s a shame those people are so lost and confused” and then probably pray we get saved from our lies. We’re no different I think we were just presented a different “out” than them. If you spend enough time and thought and energy doing ANYthing it’s not that hard to buy in. So no wonder God requires us to be constantly in him and not of everything else. No wonder you go on a mission’s trip or to bible school or wherever excessive amounts of God are and you “feel God”. Then you come home to normality and lose him because you aren’t worshiping 3 times a day and praying for hours. It’s not that much of a stretch. Why are we right? Why are there people who have NEVER known God that are better by nearly every standard then handfuls of people who wear Christ’s name. God works in brokenness right? I tend to agree, except that instead of working when I was messed it fell apart in my weakness. Right now though, I’m self sufficient and satisfied with who I am. I think I treat people better in most cases even though I lack the compassion and patience I once did because, I’m not so focused on fixing and figuring me out. It gives me time and energy to look outward more at people and I’m free to engage them.
Another thing I should make clear is I still have standards; I still have morals. They are in many ways shaped by my family (which I am thankful for) but they are also very independent of my family and of God. I can’t tell you how liberating that is for me. I still want to be good in many senses, I still want to be successful and work hard, I still want to have intention towards things but my cause and reason for doing those things is for me. Yes me. Yes I’m selfish, so are you. Perhaps I’ve just embraced and accepted it more.
I really don’t think I’m in as rough shape as some people think. In fact, I think I’m in BETTER shape than most professed Christians. If God hates luke-warm Christians like he says in his word – that they be either hot or cold. Basically pick a side! – Then I am better off and here’s why. They have a manifested crutch that they some how think is fire insurance to get into heaven but they don’t know God, they don’t pay prices or get uncomfortable for God, and I don’t believe they are included on that NARROW narrow path. It is far more a justice to God to just be honest and say it like it is rather than pay your minimal dues so no one approaches you about. It’s better because then at least you recognize and are honest about who you are so you can address making change easier if that’s what you needed. Second, people like that are staining the name of God every single day and pissing people off for God’s kingdom ten times over than drawing people into His body. Screw that. I firmly believe I am where I am for a reason and a purpose. One way or another I will have closure. Either God will come after me, my choices will finally expose an empty and worthless life, or I will remain well and simply DIFFERENT. God will dictate what will happen.
Its interesting, I was talking to Zane (a leader here) for a few hours yesterday about all this and he pointed out that in fact I was doing all the things I’m doing now when I was a Christian but I’m no longer fighting them now in my freedom. I mean, I am in some respects fighting them but certainly far less. He didn’t have clear answers he wasn’t disappointed or discouraged. He has quite a story and he believes in people and their individual stories, which shape them. I think this is a stage. This is a season. Does it scare me? Yea sure it does sometimes. What if I find what I’m looking for and never have a fallout back to Christ? What if my desires and interests get out of control and actually cause some real damage; real consequences? But I’m trusting God, I guess, that he’ll make sense of this and deal with it accordingly. If that’s what it takes so be it. I’ll tell you right now though the timing isn’t right – no more right than if you were to approach a random person in Los Vegas and say “hey do you know Jesus cause I think you should RIGHT now, cool?” Good luck. They may get to a point where they are fertile and ready. God will provide someone for that in the right timing. I will either come back stronger and different and more convicted than before, or I will lose it entirely. And I’m okay with that. God is big enough for my doubts. God is big enough to get involved when the time is right. If not, then why bother?
I’m excited. I’m excited about lots of things, and I’m happy. You may be inclined to think less of me but I might encourage you not too.
If you have specific questions you can email them to me. Otherwise, consider ourselves informed.
Love you all.
I am Jimmy.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Monday, October 27, 2008
what if we close our eyes? what if we can't wake up?
this is going to be a rather long one, sorry.
as i mentioned, i was in denver all weekend. my saturday started with stefan waking me up at 9:30 with hot eggo's. at first i was frustrated that anyone was waking me up but then i realized how amazing that deal was so i ate one and went back to sleep. slept til 12.
we left for denver just after lunch, got there at about 3, and went to the Denver zoo. it was pretty good but i think the detroit zoo was better. or perhaps it was just my experience (and particularilly the company) that made it seem better. it was "boo at the zoo" actually that day which basically means there is a bazillion kids in getups coppin some free candy right? so i think i might have had more fun at times just looking at costumes than i did at the animals themselves.
we leave the zoo, tap some quick chow, then head to the soccer game. now, i wasn't even interested in going at first but turns out it was a lot of fun. It was the last game of the season for the Colorado Rapids and the playoffs were on the line. they tied and therefore didn't make playoffs. after the game we went and got milkshakes.
one of the students, Jenny, is from denver so the 5 of us camped at her place saturday night. we watched finding nemo and although i've seen that movie 50 times easy, its probably been close to a year since I've seen it last. and i've only ever seen it with one person so it was a pre big deal. after the movie we were sort of going to bed but decided to go longboarding instead. after longboarding we found this park. i know what you're thinking, "wow jimmy! really? a park? like swings and everything?!?!" shut up. this was no elementary park my friends. i wish i had taken more pictures (i took a few) cause it had some original and DANGerous toys throughout. we got home from that at 4 am. i slept until about 12:45 that morning, just in time to run to a sports bar and catch the second half of the lions game. my fellow fans informed me that we were up 10-6 at half! so we go to boston pizza and watch the lions go 0-6. woot! not...so at this point I'm full, exhausted, i have an eye infection (cause i left my contacts in due to lack of contact case, so i had to take one out that day), and the lions just threw away another game. i was in rough shape, thats whats up. i slept that afternoon.
that night we went to a church called "scum of the earth". it was cool. i'm not gunna go into much detail but i guess it was my best church experience here so far. that says something.
alright, now that I'm through the formal update i want to try and communicate the rest of sunday to you. i haven't spoken very often on how i feel and how I'm doing, i feel like. I do a lot more "updating" on here than i do thinking. the answer to that is i simply don't think too often and if i am caught thinking I'm probably either frustrated or ignorant to my thoughts. i used to get those types of nights back home quite often where i couldn't be sociable and the only remedy seemed to be fresh air or music. i didn't necessarily like those nights but i couldn't help them from coming or going. if nothing else it felt good to have emotion but they were generally draining. on a side note i want to apologize and thank those close to me for tolerating me during those times. i can have dramatically different personalities at times and the grace you all gave me is in plain view now. so sunday night was one of those nights. i was with about 12 other kids from school and it was interesting to see how they dealt with it. actually no it wasn't interesting, they just asked 2 or 3 times each "hey jimmy, are you okay?!" to which i quickly and perkily responded "yeah dude!" the two people who saw me in that state most back home - jon and jen - learned to embrace silence and thought unless i was inclined to engage. it was a long drive home, i literally didn't say a word while i listened to my ipod. God was up to something and whenever he's up to something it seems like its in music, for me. i don't know whether i like the emotion or not.
we finally got home and i was not in any way ready for bed or for people. so even though it was after curfew i went into the main building to play guitar. i was playing for close to an hour before one of the leaders came downstairs. normally this would mean a sure "check" (just assume checks are bad...and he didn't give me one) but he is my covenant leader and we have a pretty unique comfort in the we talk and are open with one another. rather than first asking me why i was still up and not in my dorm he simply asked if i was ok to which i responded, "i can't count how often i've been asked that tonite and simply replied through my teeth that i was. i'm not okay Murdoch" (yes, his name is murdoch). he told me he had been upstairs listening to me play worship for almost 20 minutes before he came down. we talked about things for a while and it was really suiting for me to get some of my thoughts off my mind but...i am so cold and hard that even in that vulnerable state i can't even tell yet whether i made a notable step. i wish i would have written my thoughts that night because its difficult to reflect accurately on them now.
i'm still consumed with doubts and fears and pride. i doubt me. i guess if i'm honest i doubt God, that he'll meet me halfway because i feel like he left me hanging in the past. so i have barriers. i'm too weak. i feel like its a weak that extends past typical christian weakness because i see peers and family and friends wrestle through similar or worse things than me and come out breathing, maybe even striving. there is this really neat illustration that paints a great picture about how i feel:
if you put a predatory fish in with a bait fish surely its gunna eat it. obvious answer. however if you place a glass sheet across the tank between the two fish something interesting happens...the predatory fish will slam into the glass for some time without showing significant signs of slowing down but as time goes on it will approach slower and more cautiously until finally it won't attack or pursue the bait at all. if you were to at this point remove the glass that bait could swim circles around the other fish and remain untouched because the predator has been conditioned to know it can't have it. this happened both in my faith first, and then in my emotion/love second. i could expand further on how this relates to me personally but I'm going to assume you'll make the connections. i simply grew so tired of saying the same things to the same people all the time about how i was no where near where i desired to be and i could not get any closer no matter the measure i took. my struggles and vices remained unchanged despite my efforts. my weaknesses and failures continued to define me and i started to grab hold of a lot of lies. i think the following thought sums it up well...if i was approaching my walk with Christ in a healthy manner, than he was not enough to sustain me. i was depressed and exhausted. if i was mixed up and confused and mis-focused than i don't know what the hell else i was supposed to do. in my heart of hearts i was paying prices and doing everything i felt i could to grow. so if i was somehow in the wrong then i don't know what being a christian looks like. someone here said today in their faith story that they finally determined that God was not going to take the first step; he will not make us love him. what happened to the lost sheep parable? if God values me like he says he does will he not drop what he's doing and go to whatever length to find and restore me back to his body? i dare not hope, but i'd like that to be true.
i'd also like to take a second to encourage those involved in the church back home. please, please do not take for granted the talent and experience we have within our music ministry. though my joy and thankfulness for involvement outweighed the times i took it for granted i know now how much more significant it was. i miss you all and hope that you are all still pushing hard and are thankful for the gifts and confidence God has blessed that team with. and on a broader scale i'm going to encourage you that if you know God don't take THAT for granted because the second you do, you may become something entirely different. it may cost you immensely in the qualities you misplace. if you want to talk to me about that personally, i know too well. there is nothing that excites me more here at school than kids who are fleeing bondage and are serious about finding God in their lives. i know that sounds strange and contrary to my dominant thoughts I've shared, but maybe that's evidence that God has somehow not completely forsaken me.
talk soon.
this is jimmy.
as i mentioned, i was in denver all weekend. my saturday started with stefan waking me up at 9:30 with hot eggo's. at first i was frustrated that anyone was waking me up but then i realized how amazing that deal was so i ate one and went back to sleep. slept til 12.
we left for denver just after lunch, got there at about 3, and went to the Denver zoo. it was pretty good but i think the detroit zoo was better. or perhaps it was just my experience (and particularilly the company) that made it seem better. it was "boo at the zoo" actually that day which basically means there is a bazillion kids in getups coppin some free candy right? so i think i might have had more fun at times just looking at costumes than i did at the animals themselves.
we leave the zoo, tap some quick chow, then head to the soccer game. now, i wasn't even interested in going at first but turns out it was a lot of fun. It was the last game of the season for the Colorado Rapids and the playoffs were on the line. they tied and therefore didn't make playoffs. after the game we went and got milkshakes.
one of the students, Jenny, is from denver so the 5 of us camped at her place saturday night. we watched finding nemo and although i've seen that movie 50 times easy, its probably been close to a year since I've seen it last. and i've only ever seen it with one person so it was a pre big deal. after the movie we were sort of going to bed but decided to go longboarding instead. after longboarding we found this park. i know what you're thinking, "wow jimmy! really? a park? like swings and everything?!?!" shut up. this was no elementary park my friends. i wish i had taken more pictures (i took a few) cause it had some original and DANGerous toys throughout. we got home from that at 4 am. i slept until about 12:45 that morning, just in time to run to a sports bar and catch the second half of the lions game. my fellow fans informed me that we were up 10-6 at half! so we go to boston pizza and watch the lions go 0-6. woot! not...so at this point I'm full, exhausted, i have an eye infection (cause i left my contacts in due to lack of contact case, so i had to take one out that day), and the lions just threw away another game. i was in rough shape, thats whats up. i slept that afternoon.
that night we went to a church called "scum of the earth". it was cool. i'm not gunna go into much detail but i guess it was my best church experience here so far. that says something.
alright, now that I'm through the formal update i want to try and communicate the rest of sunday to you. i haven't spoken very often on how i feel and how I'm doing, i feel like. I do a lot more "updating" on here than i do thinking. the answer to that is i simply don't think too often and if i am caught thinking I'm probably either frustrated or ignorant to my thoughts. i used to get those types of nights back home quite often where i couldn't be sociable and the only remedy seemed to be fresh air or music. i didn't necessarily like those nights but i couldn't help them from coming or going. if nothing else it felt good to have emotion but they were generally draining. on a side note i want to apologize and thank those close to me for tolerating me during those times. i can have dramatically different personalities at times and the grace you all gave me is in plain view now. so sunday night was one of those nights. i was with about 12 other kids from school and it was interesting to see how they dealt with it. actually no it wasn't interesting, they just asked 2 or 3 times each "hey jimmy, are you okay?!" to which i quickly and perkily responded "yeah dude!" the two people who saw me in that state most back home - jon and jen - learned to embrace silence and thought unless i was inclined to engage. it was a long drive home, i literally didn't say a word while i listened to my ipod. God was up to something and whenever he's up to something it seems like its in music, for me. i don't know whether i like the emotion or not.
we finally got home and i was not in any way ready for bed or for people. so even though it was after curfew i went into the main building to play guitar. i was playing for close to an hour before one of the leaders came downstairs. normally this would mean a sure "check" (just assume checks are bad...and he didn't give me one) but he is my covenant leader and we have a pretty unique comfort in the we talk and are open with one another. rather than first asking me why i was still up and not in my dorm he simply asked if i was ok to which i responded, "i can't count how often i've been asked that tonite and simply replied through my teeth that i was. i'm not okay Murdoch" (yes, his name is murdoch). he told me he had been upstairs listening to me play worship for almost 20 minutes before he came down. we talked about things for a while and it was really suiting for me to get some of my thoughts off my mind but...i am so cold and hard that even in that vulnerable state i can't even tell yet whether i made a notable step. i wish i would have written my thoughts that night because its difficult to reflect accurately on them now.
i'm still consumed with doubts and fears and pride. i doubt me. i guess if i'm honest i doubt God, that he'll meet me halfway because i feel like he left me hanging in the past. so i have barriers. i'm too weak. i feel like its a weak that extends past typical christian weakness because i see peers and family and friends wrestle through similar or worse things than me and come out breathing, maybe even striving. there is this really neat illustration that paints a great picture about how i feel:
if you put a predatory fish in with a bait fish surely its gunna eat it. obvious answer. however if you place a glass sheet across the tank between the two fish something interesting happens...the predatory fish will slam into the glass for some time without showing significant signs of slowing down but as time goes on it will approach slower and more cautiously until finally it won't attack or pursue the bait at all. if you were to at this point remove the glass that bait could swim circles around the other fish and remain untouched because the predator has been conditioned to know it can't have it. this happened both in my faith first, and then in my emotion/love second. i could expand further on how this relates to me personally but I'm going to assume you'll make the connections. i simply grew so tired of saying the same things to the same people all the time about how i was no where near where i desired to be and i could not get any closer no matter the measure i took. my struggles and vices remained unchanged despite my efforts. my weaknesses and failures continued to define me and i started to grab hold of a lot of lies. i think the following thought sums it up well...if i was approaching my walk with Christ in a healthy manner, than he was not enough to sustain me. i was depressed and exhausted. if i was mixed up and confused and mis-focused than i don't know what the hell else i was supposed to do. in my heart of hearts i was paying prices and doing everything i felt i could to grow. so if i was somehow in the wrong then i don't know what being a christian looks like. someone here said today in their faith story that they finally determined that God was not going to take the first step; he will not make us love him. what happened to the lost sheep parable? if God values me like he says he does will he not drop what he's doing and go to whatever length to find and restore me back to his body? i dare not hope, but i'd like that to be true.
i'd also like to take a second to encourage those involved in the church back home. please, please do not take for granted the talent and experience we have within our music ministry. though my joy and thankfulness for involvement outweighed the times i took it for granted i know now how much more significant it was. i miss you all and hope that you are all still pushing hard and are thankful for the gifts and confidence God has blessed that team with. and on a broader scale i'm going to encourage you that if you know God don't take THAT for granted because the second you do, you may become something entirely different. it may cost you immensely in the qualities you misplace. if you want to talk to me about that personally, i know too well. there is nothing that excites me more here at school than kids who are fleeing bondage and are serious about finding God in their lives. i know that sounds strange and contrary to my dominant thoughts I've shared, but maybe that's evidence that God has somehow not completely forsaken me.
talk soon.
this is jimmy.
Friday, October 24, 2008
i keep putting this off. i'm not sure why cause i enjoy writing and i enjoy keepin you guys involved and when i wait this long i forget stuff thats happened since last update.
man, i am listening to Jon Bartel's new stuff right now and honestly i'm somewhat taken of words. dude that mix is nuts. and i have never heard that first song on your myspace..I'm real excited to pick up the full length. and I'm glad to hear you're doin so well (from your blogs).
so a common theme around here is people doing bold and different things. for example, there is a girl sitting beside me getting getting dreads as we speak. another example is that about 4 dudes pierced their ears this past week including me. I'm gunna stretch em a bit. not a lot but just enough for some small black plugs. don't worry they'll heal when i decide to take em out. i also was the proud owner of a BOLD mustache for a few days this week. there is proof on myspace for those who haven't seen these things yet. the mustache is gone now and monday marks a week where I'm gunna stretch my ears.
ok brace yourselves...Oct 21st Jimmy Whitfierce went snowboarding - the first ride of the year. let me elaborate. it was supposed to be a work day for me but i caught wind of a few guys planning a trip to strap up, so i paid someone 5$ to take my shift. so we leave at lunch for St. Mary's glacier (11,000ft elavation approx.) which has snow/ice year round. it was a mile hike up and a mile back while carrying our boards, shovels, and a rail. so we get there and its about 88% ice (much of which was spikes or rocks) with the odd patch of powder. we set up a booter but couldn't get it high enough to reach the rail so we just hit the jump some. the conditions were NASTY with no run up and no landing basically. i caught one pretty good backside grab but couldn't stop due to ice so i pitched up hard on a heap of rocks. surprisingly my body wasn't maimed too bad despite the shock although i did jam up my wrist pretty bad - the same wrist i've irritated for the 3rd time now. i posted a pic on facebook to show the bruising but you can't see it too well. its affecting my work outs but its getting better. also, there was these waves of blizzards where we couldn't see each other 5 feet away, then a few minutes later it would stop and we'd work or ride before the next wave came. we're glad we went but we wouldn't do it again. it is pretty well freezing here all day now so snow is reality now. the mountain opens in like a week and a half i think.
yesterday we went to a place nearby called "younglife". i don't know much about it except that its the biggest camp/retreat place I've ever seen. it has like a 30 man hot tub. so anyways we went there and did their high ropes course. pretty neat experience. i posted a picture or two and also have a video goin down the zipline.
i finally saw 21 the movie. man i definitly enjoyed that WAY too much. basically everything in that movie appeals to me 100 fold.
the lions are still winless and i'm losing hope. i mean, i'm in this for the long haul, i'm not looking for an easy out but man...its draining. redskins this week. i'm gunna try to find the game on someplace though i suspect its in vain to hope.
tomorrow i am going into denver with a carload of people. we're going to the zoo during the day i think and then going to a denver soccer game at night. we're then gunna stay at a students house who lives in denver so that we can hang out on sunday in denver and then go to an evening church service to a place called "scum of the earth". its a pretty non-legalistic church. apperently the pastor swore like 20 times during his sermon last week. should be interesting. the people who have been said it was just amazing.
k also i should just throw in...for those of you who are into hip hop/rap (which I'm guessing might amount to 1 or 2 people) go to www.myspace.com/116clique it is the most legit and amazing christian rap I've ever heard. trust me.
i think thats it.
bye bye.
man, i am listening to Jon Bartel's new stuff right now and honestly i'm somewhat taken of words. dude that mix is nuts. and i have never heard that first song on your myspace..I'm real excited to pick up the full length. and I'm glad to hear you're doin so well (from your blogs).
so a common theme around here is people doing bold and different things. for example, there is a girl sitting beside me getting getting dreads as we speak. another example is that about 4 dudes pierced their ears this past week including me. I'm gunna stretch em a bit. not a lot but just enough for some small black plugs. don't worry they'll heal when i decide to take em out. i also was the proud owner of a BOLD mustache for a few days this week. there is proof on myspace for those who haven't seen these things yet. the mustache is gone now and monday marks a week where I'm gunna stretch my ears.
ok brace yourselves...Oct 21st Jimmy Whitfierce went snowboarding - the first ride of the year. let me elaborate. it was supposed to be a work day for me but i caught wind of a few guys planning a trip to strap up, so i paid someone 5$ to take my shift. so we leave at lunch for St. Mary's glacier (11,000ft elavation approx.) which has snow/ice year round. it was a mile hike up and a mile back while carrying our boards, shovels, and a rail. so we get there and its about 88% ice (much of which was spikes or rocks) with the odd patch of powder. we set up a booter but couldn't get it high enough to reach the rail so we just hit the jump some. the conditions were NASTY with no run up and no landing basically. i caught one pretty good backside grab but couldn't stop due to ice so i pitched up hard on a heap of rocks. surprisingly my body wasn't maimed too bad despite the shock although i did jam up my wrist pretty bad - the same wrist i've irritated for the 3rd time now. i posted a pic on facebook to show the bruising but you can't see it too well. its affecting my work outs but its getting better. also, there was these waves of blizzards where we couldn't see each other 5 feet away, then a few minutes later it would stop and we'd work or ride before the next wave came. we're glad we went but we wouldn't do it again. it is pretty well freezing here all day now so snow is reality now. the mountain opens in like a week and a half i think.
yesterday we went to a place nearby called "younglife". i don't know much about it except that its the biggest camp/retreat place I've ever seen. it has like a 30 man hot tub. so anyways we went there and did their high ropes course. pretty neat experience. i posted a picture or two and also have a video goin down the zipline.
i finally saw 21 the movie. man i definitly enjoyed that WAY too much. basically everything in that movie appeals to me 100 fold.
the lions are still winless and i'm losing hope. i mean, i'm in this for the long haul, i'm not looking for an easy out but man...its draining. redskins this week. i'm gunna try to find the game on someplace though i suspect its in vain to hope.
tomorrow i am going into denver with a carload of people. we're going to the zoo during the day i think and then going to a denver soccer game at night. we're then gunna stay at a students house who lives in denver so that we can hang out on sunday in denver and then go to an evening church service to a place called "scum of the earth". its a pretty non-legalistic church. apperently the pastor swore like 20 times during his sermon last week. should be interesting. the people who have been said it was just amazing.
k also i should just throw in...for those of you who are into hip hop/rap (which I'm guessing might amount to 1 or 2 people) go to www.myspace.com/116clique it is the most legit and amazing christian rap I've ever heard. trust me.
i think thats it.
bye bye.
Friday, October 17, 2008
I’m back! And man is it nice.
turned out to be a pretty long and interesting week. not sure how my thoughts will decode into words depending on my mood. There were definitely positive things but it wasn’t easy or glamorous most of the time.
so we leave last week on Thursday morning – three 15 passenger vans strong – for Celina Oklahoma. Took us something like 12 hours to get there but we kept busy. In fact, I might say it was a party all the way there. We were always playing games or wrestling or something or other. We played this one game where someone started this simple clap pattern and everyone just built on it with claps or beats. It actually turned out sooo good. So we get to the church we’re staying for the night and there is this sweet youth room with music videos playing, two pool tables, foosball, music equipment, and way too much candy and pop. We stayed up late, walked around town, played some poker – it was all round a good night. We leave the following morning at 6 am or something and finally arrive in Beaumont Texas at about 11 or 12.
just in case any of you are lost, we went down to texas to help clean up the disaster from hurricane Ike instead of going on our scheduled week long camp trip to Moab Utah. So basically the 35 of us got assigned to 3 or 4 separate teams each day, then got assigned to a house, then went and cleaned out the house as well as gutting it down to its joints. Cabinets, appliances, toilets, carpets, drywall, everything. Our first house was actually great. We didn’t know it at the time but in hindsight, it was our easiest one. We saw a bunch of gecko’s, tree frogs, cockroaches, and a couple snakes as we were doin demolition. I’m not gunna go into more detail about the houses specifically but I will say that I smelt things I had never smelt before and touched things that were unspeakably disgusting. Imagine several feet of water sitting for weeks and weeks (5 weeks since the hurricane) and just doin havoc to all their stuff. It was humid, maybe worse than we get at home, so we were literally sopping wet all the time and the smells, again (even with masks on) were enough to make me light headed sometimes. I think a lot of us expected worse though. We saw pictures and probably imagined homes that were in splinters or crumbled over and super dramatic stuff like that but really what it looked like was simply every single home was standing but had a 5-10 foot pile of garbage in front of their house. Literally everything had to be thrown out. So it was interesting to understand the perspective finally that for us it almost seemed a little anticlimactic at first cause all the houses were still there, and basically It was just a terrible flood, but when you think about it they all have to completely start over. Its hard to imagine that at all. And its sobering too to understand how materialistic and selfish I am. I get reminded of that daily but I mean, this was bad.
so we stayed at another church while in texas the whole time. They treated us well. We slept on cots (which weren’t so pleasant) but at least we had hot showers. Went to their service on Sunday – ew. We also went a couple times out to this authentic Mexican restaurant that was within walking distance. I’ll get pics up of a bunch of this stuff up sooner or later. another crazy thing about this trip was that whenever we weren’t at church (like were on the jobsite) we always had to eat what were called MRE’s, unless we got lucky and the Red Cross truck came around with warm meals. So basically an MRE stands for Meals Ready to Eat. Its literally what the army eats. So say you get beef stew it’ll come with a pack of beef stew, some crackers n cheese sauce, a cookie, raisons, and maybe one other gross thing. Then you put the hot part of the meal in a special pouch with salt water and it cooks – pretty wild. They are all gross. They don’t taste like much its more just substance. And they have like 1500 caleries, 180 carbs, and whatever else excessive amounts of energy that is impossible to use up. That whole thing was an interesting experience in itself.
also, on Sunday we had the day off after church so Pete organized a little canoe trip. It was in a river that wasn’t too big, and it had pretty sweet sand beaches along side it some places that we stopped and played on for breaks. The one main stop we had we played a bunch of football and Frisbee at first but the things got more aggressive. Me and Jamie (the guy I gave the concussion too and who used to be like a national champ wrestler) went up against a bunch of people in chicken fights…we went undefeated. Must be all the workin out I’ve been doin. After that we played a HUGE game of british bulldog. Also incredible. I finished second or better (of about 20) all three games. There were some minor injuries rest assured. K, so we keep canoeing and my canoe partner happens to be Stephan. If you don’t remember he’s my favorite. Check facebook for a reference. Sooo we decided to be pirates for the day right? Great idea! We put bandana’s on our mouths and made a lot of growling noises and then proceeded to steal the life jackets from every canoe that we could. One canoe got sassy with us and stole a couple from OUR huge pile. So Stephan hops from ours onto theirs but as its beginning to capsize he jumps back to ours and we flip too. After we finally recovered one of the leaders told us that if we get stopped or caught without lifejackets in every canoe it’s a 500 hundred dollar fine soooooo basically we played delivery boys the rest of the time catching up and giving people back their life jackets. It was a sweet day.
I’ll skip the rest of the week up until yesterday when we were about to leave. Nate, one of the dudes here was out at 6am helping load up the trailer and apparently got maimed by some fire ants…interesting and unfortunate. Well, turns out it was far more unfortunate because he found out he was allergic to them. He started rashing and swelling up all over his body so they eventually sent him to the hospital. The other two vans left back to that church in Oklahoma but our van of about 10 dudes stayed back until 3 o clock to wait for nate. Since it was a bit of a weird situation and we wouldn’t have arrived in Oklahoma until 5 in the morning we decided to crash at Eric’s house (another student) who lives in texas. This entire thing turned out to be a MASSIVE blessing in disguise. We had a BBQ, went swimming and hot tubbing, played a lot of video games, played some poker, and camped out on computers until 4 in the morning when we departed. So we had a friggin great night to wind down, and then we slept from like 5 til 2 in the afternoon. And now I feel fantastic and we’re back home in Colorado. We took a shorter way home and got home before the other group, hehe.
so that leads us up until right now! We’ve been doin some intense ab sessions and they keep getting more intense. We’re lookin into weights and splittin some protein products even. Tres bien. Now, we have the weekend off and most of Monday.
please lions please. this is the weekend.
turned out to be a pretty long and interesting week. not sure how my thoughts will decode into words depending on my mood. There were definitely positive things but it wasn’t easy or glamorous most of the time.
so we leave last week on Thursday morning – three 15 passenger vans strong – for Celina Oklahoma. Took us something like 12 hours to get there but we kept busy. In fact, I might say it was a party all the way there. We were always playing games or wrestling or something or other. We played this one game where someone started this simple clap pattern and everyone just built on it with claps or beats. It actually turned out sooo good. So we get to the church we’re staying for the night and there is this sweet youth room with music videos playing, two pool tables, foosball, music equipment, and way too much candy and pop. We stayed up late, walked around town, played some poker – it was all round a good night. We leave the following morning at 6 am or something and finally arrive in Beaumont Texas at about 11 or 12.
just in case any of you are lost, we went down to texas to help clean up the disaster from hurricane Ike instead of going on our scheduled week long camp trip to Moab Utah. So basically the 35 of us got assigned to 3 or 4 separate teams each day, then got assigned to a house, then went and cleaned out the house as well as gutting it down to its joints. Cabinets, appliances, toilets, carpets, drywall, everything. Our first house was actually great. We didn’t know it at the time but in hindsight, it was our easiest one. We saw a bunch of gecko’s, tree frogs, cockroaches, and a couple snakes as we were doin demolition. I’m not gunna go into more detail about the houses specifically but I will say that I smelt things I had never smelt before and touched things that were unspeakably disgusting. Imagine several feet of water sitting for weeks and weeks (5 weeks since the hurricane) and just doin havoc to all their stuff. It was humid, maybe worse than we get at home, so we were literally sopping wet all the time and the smells, again (even with masks on) were enough to make me light headed sometimes. I think a lot of us expected worse though. We saw pictures and probably imagined homes that were in splinters or crumbled over and super dramatic stuff like that but really what it looked like was simply every single home was standing but had a 5-10 foot pile of garbage in front of their house. Literally everything had to be thrown out. So it was interesting to understand the perspective finally that for us it almost seemed a little anticlimactic at first cause all the houses were still there, and basically It was just a terrible flood, but when you think about it they all have to completely start over. Its hard to imagine that at all. And its sobering too to understand how materialistic and selfish I am. I get reminded of that daily but I mean, this was bad.
so we stayed at another church while in texas the whole time. They treated us well. We slept on cots (which weren’t so pleasant) but at least we had hot showers. Went to their service on Sunday – ew. We also went a couple times out to this authentic Mexican restaurant that was within walking distance. I’ll get pics up of a bunch of this stuff up sooner or later. another crazy thing about this trip was that whenever we weren’t at church (like were on the jobsite) we always had to eat what were called MRE’s, unless we got lucky and the Red Cross truck came around with warm meals. So basically an MRE stands for Meals Ready to Eat. Its literally what the army eats. So say you get beef stew it’ll come with a pack of beef stew, some crackers n cheese sauce, a cookie, raisons, and maybe one other gross thing. Then you put the hot part of the meal in a special pouch with salt water and it cooks – pretty wild. They are all gross. They don’t taste like much its more just substance. And they have like 1500 caleries, 180 carbs, and whatever else excessive amounts of energy that is impossible to use up. That whole thing was an interesting experience in itself.
also, on Sunday we had the day off after church so Pete organized a little canoe trip. It was in a river that wasn’t too big, and it had pretty sweet sand beaches along side it some places that we stopped and played on for breaks. The one main stop we had we played a bunch of football and Frisbee at first but the things got more aggressive. Me and Jamie (the guy I gave the concussion too and who used to be like a national champ wrestler) went up against a bunch of people in chicken fights…we went undefeated. Must be all the workin out I’ve been doin. After that we played a HUGE game of british bulldog. Also incredible. I finished second or better (of about 20) all three games. There were some minor injuries rest assured. K, so we keep canoeing and my canoe partner happens to be Stephan. If you don’t remember he’s my favorite. Check facebook for a reference. Sooo we decided to be pirates for the day right? Great idea! We put bandana’s on our mouths and made a lot of growling noises and then proceeded to steal the life jackets from every canoe that we could. One canoe got sassy with us and stole a couple from OUR huge pile. So Stephan hops from ours onto theirs but as its beginning to capsize he jumps back to ours and we flip too. After we finally recovered one of the leaders told us that if we get stopped or caught without lifejackets in every canoe it’s a 500 hundred dollar fine soooooo basically we played delivery boys the rest of the time catching up and giving people back their life jackets. It was a sweet day.
I’ll skip the rest of the week up until yesterday when we were about to leave. Nate, one of the dudes here was out at 6am helping load up the trailer and apparently got maimed by some fire ants…interesting and unfortunate. Well, turns out it was far more unfortunate because he found out he was allergic to them. He started rashing and swelling up all over his body so they eventually sent him to the hospital. The other two vans left back to that church in Oklahoma but our van of about 10 dudes stayed back until 3 o clock to wait for nate. Since it was a bit of a weird situation and we wouldn’t have arrived in Oklahoma until 5 in the morning we decided to crash at Eric’s house (another student) who lives in texas. This entire thing turned out to be a MASSIVE blessing in disguise. We had a BBQ, went swimming and hot tubbing, played a lot of video games, played some poker, and camped out on computers until 4 in the morning when we departed. So we had a friggin great night to wind down, and then we slept from like 5 til 2 in the afternoon. And now I feel fantastic and we’re back home in Colorado. We took a shorter way home and got home before the other group, hehe.
so that leads us up until right now! We’ve been doin some intense ab sessions and they keep getting more intense. We’re lookin into weights and splittin some protein products even. Tres bien. Now, we have the weekend off and most of Monday.
please lions please. this is the weekend.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
so a couple days ago we acquired a mascot. one of our dudes went to take a shower and found a mouse in our washroom. so we've got like 5 dudes jumping around screaming about having a pet, so we throw on some gloves and cornered him into a trash can. it was awesome. his name was Moses the mouse. unfortunately it only lasted a day. i wanted to feed him and keep him around but someone let him go.
i just got back from Dan's place (my principle). we had an inCREDible coffee (fresh ground beans, pressed and everything.) and just talked all afternoon. that dude is amazing. i love his family so much. and as unstable as i am i can be honest with him and wrestle through things without feeling threatened and, at the same time i have enough experience and understanding to talk intelligently about issues and christian stuff.
so yesterday i went long boarding again. i was using a dudes long board was squeaking a bit but i decided it would be fine. so we start going down this trail and its not feeling real good but i had headphones in and couldn't hear. so i keep rippin and then....the WHEEL falls off! bloooddyyy. i bail, pick up the board, and then walk over to the highway to try and hitchhike down. no one picked me up.
last night we played football out on the to-be hockey rink. its basically just a nice wide open grass area that is cut short and nice. so its like 25 degrees out and we're playin football. it was fun except i took a pretty bad shot to the head, and thigh, and wrist. i'm feeling better today though.
ok so in big news, we were supposed to leave for MOAB Utah this week for a big ol camp/backpack trip. it was gunna be campin, hikin, bikin, climbin, etc. they do it every year. but a couple weeks ago an opportunity came up in Texas to serve and help clean up the mess from hurricane Ike that apparently ripped through there. so we were wrestling with what to do, and last night concluded that we were goin to texas. some local tiny churches gave us 2,000$ of gas money, and a third van to get down with. its a 20 hour drive and we're not aloud ipods. they want us to develope community on this trip and spend a lot of time in solitude. it's gunna be rough especially for me. so anyways, I'll be back in a week. we leave tomorrow.
we were doin 2-a-days for about the past week with regard to ab workouts but its slowed down a bit. we get up at 7, workout, go in the hot tub at 7:30, then give ourselves ten minutes to get ready for breakfast at 8. I've also been running about 3-4 times a week. i do about 4 kms which i'm really pleased with at this altitude. progress feels slow, its hard to tell. but we'll see.
had my first phone call the other night. it was with Jen and it was awesome. if anyone really really wants to talk to me, send me an email and we can maybe arrange for it.
thanks for stoppin in.
Jimmmmi
i just got back from Dan's place (my principle). we had an inCREDible coffee (fresh ground beans, pressed and everything.) and just talked all afternoon. that dude is amazing. i love his family so much. and as unstable as i am i can be honest with him and wrestle through things without feeling threatened and, at the same time i have enough experience and understanding to talk intelligently about issues and christian stuff.
so yesterday i went long boarding again. i was using a dudes long board was squeaking a bit but i decided it would be fine. so we start going down this trail and its not feeling real good but i had headphones in and couldn't hear. so i keep rippin and then....the WHEEL falls off! bloooddyyy. i bail, pick up the board, and then walk over to the highway to try and hitchhike down. no one picked me up.
last night we played football out on the to-be hockey rink. its basically just a nice wide open grass area that is cut short and nice. so its like 25 degrees out and we're playin football. it was fun except i took a pretty bad shot to the head, and thigh, and wrist. i'm feeling better today though.
ok so in big news, we were supposed to leave for MOAB Utah this week for a big ol camp/backpack trip. it was gunna be campin, hikin, bikin, climbin, etc. they do it every year. but a couple weeks ago an opportunity came up in Texas to serve and help clean up the mess from hurricane Ike that apparently ripped through there. so we were wrestling with what to do, and last night concluded that we were goin to texas. some local tiny churches gave us 2,000$ of gas money, and a third van to get down with. its a 20 hour drive and we're not aloud ipods. they want us to develope community on this trip and spend a lot of time in solitude. it's gunna be rough especially for me. so anyways, I'll be back in a week. we leave tomorrow.
we were doin 2-a-days for about the past week with regard to ab workouts but its slowed down a bit. we get up at 7, workout, go in the hot tub at 7:30, then give ourselves ten minutes to get ready for breakfast at 8. I've also been running about 3-4 times a week. i do about 4 kms which i'm really pleased with at this altitude. progress feels slow, its hard to tell. but we'll see.
had my first phone call the other night. it was with Jen and it was awesome. if anyone really really wants to talk to me, send me an email and we can maybe arrange for it.
thanks for stoppin in.
Jimmmmi
Saturday, October 4, 2008
I hate camping.
we went on a camping trip this weekend and I mmeaaannn parts of it were ok but for the most part I’m not a fan of camping. Keep in mind the last time I went camping we had a 15” TV, xbox 360, original Nintendo, and a fridge all inside of our tent. So this was somewhat of a downgrade.
so we get there Thursday night and have dinner and then some devo/worship after that around a fire. By the time that was done we were wondering what we were gunna do besides throw a football or explore (plus it was real dark by now) so somehow this crazy fire game evolved. A couple dudes started throwing hot ashes from the firepit up into the air and other dudes started hitting them in mid air too. So basically it was fire volleyball, or perhaps hacky sack. I think I named it ashball. It was super intense. One got caught in a guys hood once and another time it got stuck in a guys bandana tied around his neck. I have some sweet photo’s of it that I will post.
Saturday was cave day. Three separate groups went into this cave up in the mountain. The exploring lasted 3 hours in each case. I was a bit nervous at first but it turned out to be awweeesssome. Everything was wet and thus very slippery and there was no flatground; everything was an obstacle. Many of these obstacles were very very small holes or cracks we had to squeeze through also. One dude at our school is legally blind so it was pretty scary when we do anything with him. He can see a little but he can’t drive. He’s 23 and I think he’s albino (from what I’m told). Oh and he’s from Alberta. On a side note, the other three Canadians here are some of the three weirdest people here. That sounds bad I know, but its sort of a sad standard for peoples stereotypes toward Canada. Anyways, so this dude has to make a 3 or 4 foot jump and misses. He lands on his chest and slides into a crevice. I wasn’t there but I heard the story. It sounded bad, and the wounds looked real bad. Aside from that nothing to serious. I have a completely blue shin and some other bruises. Oh, and one dude was exploring and got the back of his knee ripped up on a rusty piece of barbed wire so he had to go get a tetnus shot. Something ALWAYS happens here like that.
so caving was awesome. I’ll post some pics of that too. The rest of the weekend was fine. I just hate cleaning up dirty cloths and cleaning up and feeling super greasy and stinky and stuff. Speaking of stinky there was a sulphur river next to our camp that was like 50 degrees so a couple dudes took baths in there. Apparently sulphur is good for your skin?
so I’m really anticipating the Lions game tomorrow. I forgot to tell you guys too that we’re about 8 fans strong here now too. It started when I found 2 lions fans about 4 days ago then, the four of us just started asking people if they wanted to be a lions fan and they were down. So 6 or 7 of us are going to this pub in town that is showing the game. I NEED them to come through this week.
I listened to the Hillsongs album entitled “this is our God” 3 times through this weekend. Its outstanding. I mean, its predictably hillsongs just coming through with another bombshell. As good as it is though I could hardly even stand it. It reminded me of too many things. It reminded me of “home”, reminded me of certain people, reminded me of quiet car rides, reminded me of worship and bass, reminded me of emotion…it was sort of strange to deal with. It was the most spiritual experience I’ve had since I’ve been here. If I could possibly somehow find God I feel like my best chances are in music. There are too many lies that slow me down though, too many Christ-follower stories that discourage me when they’ve lacked any change, and knowing too well my weaknesses and where the treasure of my heart is. I realized something today. I’ve said this before but I hate my bodytype more than anything. I hate feeling sort of big and I’d kill to be cut, but even though I am running and trying to takes steps I still lack the discipline to get the job done well. So if I struggle this much in changing something I’m VERY passionate about, how do I suppose I am going to change a lifestyle that I don’t hate; sin that I don’t detest.
there is no stability in my thought life but again, all I can say is we’ll see.
check out the new pics. And cheer hard for the lions tomorrow.
bye friends.
Jimmy.
p.s. mom the new sleeping bag was a DREAM. It was like 15 farentheit at night and I was hot in my bundies. Mummy sleeping bags are a miracle. Also, the fact that I’ve managed to spend as much money as I have in one month is a also a miracle. Or a nightmare.
we went on a camping trip this weekend and I mmeaaannn parts of it were ok but for the most part I’m not a fan of camping. Keep in mind the last time I went camping we had a 15” TV, xbox 360, original Nintendo, and a fridge all inside of our tent. So this was somewhat of a downgrade.
so we get there Thursday night and have dinner and then some devo/worship after that around a fire. By the time that was done we were wondering what we were gunna do besides throw a football or explore (plus it was real dark by now) so somehow this crazy fire game evolved. A couple dudes started throwing hot ashes from the firepit up into the air and other dudes started hitting them in mid air too. So basically it was fire volleyball, or perhaps hacky sack. I think I named it ashball. It was super intense. One got caught in a guys hood once and another time it got stuck in a guys bandana tied around his neck. I have some sweet photo’s of it that I will post.
Saturday was cave day. Three separate groups went into this cave up in the mountain. The exploring lasted 3 hours in each case. I was a bit nervous at first but it turned out to be awweeesssome. Everything was wet and thus very slippery and there was no flatground; everything was an obstacle. Many of these obstacles were very very small holes or cracks we had to squeeze through also. One dude at our school is legally blind so it was pretty scary when we do anything with him. He can see a little but he can’t drive. He’s 23 and I think he’s albino (from what I’m told). Oh and he’s from Alberta. On a side note, the other three Canadians here are some of the three weirdest people here. That sounds bad I know, but its sort of a sad standard for peoples stereotypes toward Canada. Anyways, so this dude has to make a 3 or 4 foot jump and misses. He lands on his chest and slides into a crevice. I wasn’t there but I heard the story. It sounded bad, and the wounds looked real bad. Aside from that nothing to serious. I have a completely blue shin and some other bruises. Oh, and one dude was exploring and got the back of his knee ripped up on a rusty piece of barbed wire so he had to go get a tetnus shot. Something ALWAYS happens here like that.
so caving was awesome. I’ll post some pics of that too. The rest of the weekend was fine. I just hate cleaning up dirty cloths and cleaning up and feeling super greasy and stinky and stuff. Speaking of stinky there was a sulphur river next to our camp that was like 50 degrees so a couple dudes took baths in there. Apparently sulphur is good for your skin?
so I’m really anticipating the Lions game tomorrow. I forgot to tell you guys too that we’re about 8 fans strong here now too. It started when I found 2 lions fans about 4 days ago then, the four of us just started asking people if they wanted to be a lions fan and they were down. So 6 or 7 of us are going to this pub in town that is showing the game. I NEED them to come through this week.
I listened to the Hillsongs album entitled “this is our God” 3 times through this weekend. Its outstanding. I mean, its predictably hillsongs just coming through with another bombshell. As good as it is though I could hardly even stand it. It reminded me of too many things. It reminded me of “home”, reminded me of certain people, reminded me of quiet car rides, reminded me of worship and bass, reminded me of emotion…it was sort of strange to deal with. It was the most spiritual experience I’ve had since I’ve been here. If I could possibly somehow find God I feel like my best chances are in music. There are too many lies that slow me down though, too many Christ-follower stories that discourage me when they’ve lacked any change, and knowing too well my weaknesses and where the treasure of my heart is. I realized something today. I’ve said this before but I hate my bodytype more than anything. I hate feeling sort of big and I’d kill to be cut, but even though I am running and trying to takes steps I still lack the discipline to get the job done well. So if I struggle this much in changing something I’m VERY passionate about, how do I suppose I am going to change a lifestyle that I don’t hate; sin that I don’t detest.
there is no stability in my thought life but again, all I can say is we’ll see.
check out the new pics. And cheer hard for the lions tomorrow.
bye friends.
Jimmy.
p.s. mom the new sleeping bag was a DREAM. It was like 15 farentheit at night and I was hot in my bundies. Mummy sleeping bags are a miracle. Also, the fact that I’ve managed to spend as much money as I have in one month is a also a miracle. Or a nightmare.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
if you are not into football, go ahead and skip to the next paragraph. a pretty disappointing start from the Lions of course, going 0-3. i feel like this week is going to be one of the most important games of their season. They just came off their bye week so they had time to rest a bit, and re-evaluate whats been going wrong. primarilly its the first half thats diggin their weekly grave. points in first half against detroit were 0-21, 0-21, and 3-21 i think. no wonder. they only have 3 sacks, so pressure on Orton is gunna be something to watch and hope for this week, and detroit needs to create some turnovers too since they've struggled with that. another key element is that there is still lots of time left (13 games) and no one in the division is really pulling away yet. this week is against the bears (a division rival) so it is their chance to get some momentum going here, and feed that hunger they've aquired for some W's. another major part of this week is that it is going to be my first week of actually getting to WATCH the game. Fox doesn't play lions games up here but i went and did some homework in town today and found a place that has NFL ticket, so they are going to show it there.
there is still a lot of exciting things going on here nearly everyday. i guess its just slightly less exciting or notable than the first couple weeks, but i will continue to update of course. my knee and leg are still messed up. i keep re-straining my knee, and i went on a 3 mile run the other day that ruined my calves. now see, that is a problem because tomorrow morning we leave for the men's retreat weekend to some place where we will be hiking and camping and doin a bunch of stuff in a cave or something...i dunno details. its gunna be wild though. I'll make sure to get some pics m k?
the other night i connected with a couple guys on a different level than we've experienced thus far. there is a lot of struggle and conflict in each of our faiths (mine most, by far) but we all want to give this an honest chance and start paying some prices for Christ's sake. after this retreat we are meeting every night to work through romans, and just talk and pray and stuff. we found a sweet secret place in the woods to make fires for these meetings. so that is hopeful. i guess. we'll see.
i'll get back to you guys on sunday night probably ok? i feel like i'm leaving out a lot of details or stories. must mean i need to update more often so i remember stuff.
have a great weekend.
there is still a lot of exciting things going on here nearly everyday. i guess its just slightly less exciting or notable than the first couple weeks, but i will continue to update of course. my knee and leg are still messed up. i keep re-straining my knee, and i went on a 3 mile run the other day that ruined my calves. now see, that is a problem because tomorrow morning we leave for the men's retreat weekend to some place where we will be hiking and camping and doin a bunch of stuff in a cave or something...i dunno details. its gunna be wild though. I'll make sure to get some pics m k?
the other night i connected with a couple guys on a different level than we've experienced thus far. there is a lot of struggle and conflict in each of our faiths (mine most, by far) but we all want to give this an honest chance and start paying some prices for Christ's sake. after this retreat we are meeting every night to work through romans, and just talk and pray and stuff. we found a sweet secret place in the woods to make fires for these meetings. so that is hopeful. i guess. we'll see.
i'll get back to you guys on sunday night probably ok? i feel like i'm leaving out a lot of details or stories. must mean i need to update more often so i remember stuff.
have a great weekend.
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